Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Every customer is special & unique.* And you uniqueness is why I've chosen to not deal with you.

I ditched a client today. Or last night, rather. I've never done that before, just walked from a job. I pretty much always finish the job. But this one... I'm not going to go into details, but this was literally a matter of, "Okay, I'm keeping the deposit, here's all the work, you do whatever you want with it, best of luck, buhbye."

I knew when she had read the email because my phone rang four times between 7:30 & 8 am this morning. She's also texted me twice because she's paranoid about me putting discs in the mail to her. Yeah no, dude, I don't wanna deal with you in person. I asked the guy in our mail room to put a tracking number on the envelope, I'll email her the tracking number and she can watch it religiously for the 24 hours it will take for the envelope to go from Manhattan Beach to her P.O. Box in Beverly Hills.

It's like the career version of a breakup, I tell you.

On the one hand, I know I'm doing the right thing for me, because I'm already feeling better. I literally was getting to the point where all I did was work on her stuff so I could finish the gig, and then she would revise even after I explained that we couldn't, and I would have to go back again. I'd been hating working on freelance lately because of it. But now I'm already thinking, "I can go finish the product list for XClient tonight..." and "I'll have time to work on YClient's opening tonight..."

On the other, I have these voicemails on my cellphone that I know I'm going to have to erase without even listening to them. Because if I do, I'll start to feel guilty.

::sigh:: I need less of a conscience, I tell you. And when I'm saying that, you know it's bad.

...which brings me to the fact that I know that a certain member of my dept. has returned. I know this because before I even turned around I could smell her presence. And not in the good way.

*actual sentence that I heard my HelloKittyCoWorker say to the guy at Enterprise when he was giving her a hard time about her rental car. We've since turned it into a phrase of mockage. hee.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Dear Boss:

On your first day, you introduced yourself to the dept. & repeated the sentence, "But don't worry, I'm not a micromanager" about five times.

Maybe it was me being all wacky & paranoid, but I sort of took that as a warning sign.

Sadly, I was right. ::sigh::

Anyway, as part of your quest to rule the world and dictate our breathing patterns, you've moved our weekly dept. meetings, which used to be casual affairs in our actual dept., to the conference room. Possibly this is in part to the fact that several members of our dept., myself included, actually started getting up to walk away from the meeting & go back to our desks to voluntarily go back to doing work rather than sit there while various other members of our dept. rambled on. However, instead of trying to fix the problem that was kind of indicated by three of your four staff members bailing from the meeting, you put us somewhere that we can't politely escape. Way to go. (Incidentally, we're thinking that we may all have to go to the bathroom next time.)

But seriously. Seriously, I know I don't have a lot of managerial experience, it's not like I ran a dept of 40 people twice my age when I was 19 & doubled the output per shift, or I was a project manager for a major utility company or... okay, sure, I'm a young'in who finds your attempts to be my mom annoying, I realize that my expertise is limited & surely not worth your time.

However, on a grammatical note, I would like to humbly suggest the following. When setting up the Outlook reminder for your dept. meetings, we're way less likely to smirk if you spell "weekly" in a proper fashion. I don't know what a "Weelly" Meeting is, but I'm sure I'll be given specs & semantics from the outside agency that Altruism!Co has hired so that I can just carry out their directions rather than actually think in a fashion such as the company hired me to do.

I'm just sayin'.

~ Claris

who is thinking that since this is the second in-house mktg. dept. she's been hired into who then insists they need an outside ad agency to tell them what to do, she just might go to an ad agency since they seem to be the only people qualified to actually make any decisions. Plus, well... they pay better. Once again... just sayin'.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Are we there yet?

Last night, I ran 8 miles.

I'd never done that before.

In October, I signed up for the 1st LA half-marathon. My running distance pretty much taps out around 5 miles, and once we got past regatta season, I knew I'd need a new training goal. (because I'm sick like that, that's why) So I've been running, running.. and not going any further than 5 miles.

Well, a half-marathon is 13, so 5 miles ain't really helping the goal.

So last night, I decided eh, fuck it, I'm gonna make the jump to eight. (my two running routes are a 3 mile and then the five mile is the 3 mile with a 2 mile added on. By going to 8, I could just redo the 3mile loop & not have to worry about a pedometer.) If nothing else, it was worth it for

a) the look on Zoey's face when we didn't stop at the end of the five miles route - I swear I saw the canine version of "what the fuck?"
b) we've finally hit the distance where we get to the end of the run & my dog is actually tired. Thank the gods.

I stretched for about half an hour after, and I lost a bit of my ability to carry on a cognizant conversation with lawgeekgurl when she called, but other than that I woke up today being pretty all right. Which just means that I get to do it again on Thurs night, and then next week I'll go to ten miles.

For Christmas, I think I'm getting myself a massage. Indeed.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

'cause you KNOW that picture's going to haunt him forever.

Okay, seriously? I know we shouldn't encourage kids to do this, but in this case, I think they should have just given him the damn SpongeBob...

Toddler gets stuck in vending machine

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Stop the whirligig, I need to get off.

I called a co-worker a whirlygig of fun the other day, & she didn't believe "whirligig" was a real word. I made her look it up on, & hey, it's a real word. Yay real words!

I am tired, people. Verra, verra tired. I've got three active freelance clients in the last... oh, 30% worth of work on their sites, and a fourth that's kind of dithering with her last 50%, I've got a trip to Boston on the 21st, and the Big!Gala! for Altruism!Co. on Nov. 4th. My brain, she's ready to shut off.

Which is totally why I decided to do the first L.A. half marathon on Dec. 3rd. 'cause I'm on crack that way. Actually, I decided to do it because I'm not really crosstraining as I should be, & if I don't have an actual goal, I won't crosstrain, which will inevitably lead to me getting injured, and that would be bad. So I've got to go sign up & give them my $55. I also have to send the info to A & S, because it would seem that I'm not the only member of my crew team that's a little bit on rowing overload as we hit the last two weeks before the Charles - of course, they're also the only other two people besides me that have been to just about every single practice five or six days a week since June, so I think it's a little understandable that we're kind of hitting the wall, even if there are still three regattas to go after Boston. Head of the American, Head of the Marina, and NARF. Oy. R.S. Monkey, do you realize it's going to be our Competition Rowerversairy at Head of the Marina? I think the Mighty Four needs to tailgate out of the back of my car again in celebration of survival. *g* Of course, if I end up doing Head of the American in a single, I'm really gonna need a drink after that, straight shot course or not.

I have to say though, that even just running four miles around my neighborhood with Zoey last night actually felt good - I've been mostly living on the elliptical & the erg, & really only running a mile to warm up lately, and Zoey loves to run, so I think that forcing myself to work out in an environment that doesn't involve central air, girls that do cardio in makeup, and guys wearing spandex with suspenders will be good for me. Don't get me wrong, the facilities at my gym are great, and I got a ridiculously cheap price on my membership because the guy that was doing sales knows that I used to do his job so he didn't bother trying to upsell me (which is probably why he's since been made the manager of the place), but when your gym is in the section of Hollywood surrounded by studios & is next to a dance studio... it's possible there's a certain Barbie Factor. As my brother said when he lived with me for two weeks, "The gym is great, but the environment is kinda... special. That's it. Your gym is special."

So I started this entry at about 8:15 am. It is now 2:15 pm, & in the interim, I've managed to pitch two year-long data collection projects, propose major changes to our corporate sponsorship packets, blatantly use Anya's job to get me the info I'll need for the sponsorship packets (which I think scared my boss with the turnaround time on "Yeah, I've already called someone"), do a rush job to thank two House of Representatives members & a Senator, a quick conference call with a freelance client, and fix a billing issue with another client's server. None of these things were on my agenda for the day, and I have two hours left before I am openly bailing from my office to go to the gym & then meet SpecialK at my house to have what is becoming our monthly "I have mending/glueing/sewing/other project to do but need another set of hands" night at my apt.


Oh, and I need to write back to the guy that I've been emailing with from OnlineDatingSite - all the people in LA that could be on this site, I get emailed by another rower. No. Joke.
Stop laughing, R.S. Monkey - he did 4 yrs at Ohio State & used to row with OtherClubInTheMarinaThatRowsWhiteBoats. True story.
But before I dash off again, is anyone else really saddened by the fact that the GOP managed to get McCain to drink the Kool-Aid? I mean, seriously, your party's been in office for six years. There's only so long you can blame the last guy & without sounding like your dog ate your homework, people.

Random Nantucket Nectars factoid: Nantucket Airlines named one of their planes Flagship Whalers in honor of the Nantucket High School sports teams.

Monday, October 02, 2006

I just, I don't... yeah, I got nothin'.

Seriously, I'm sure there might eventually be comedy gold in this somewhere, but what the hell kind of crappy terrorist are you that the only people you can take out are the Amish?

Man holds Amish school hostage

Dude, they're Amish. That's like saying you beat up a 4 year old - there's no accomplishment in that. what the fuck? This guy didn't kill himself because he was afraid of the cops - he got halfway through this bullshit & realized what was going to happen in prison when they found out he terrorized a group of people who don't even use cars. 'cause you know there's no way that would end well for him...

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Rumors of my death... aren't that far off.

New boss.
Freelance to finish.
Practice to attend.
Sleep to be deprived of.
Apartment that direly needs cleaning.
Bulletin board that I need to get fuzzy yarn for so that we can start a-pimpin' it out.

Things that would have commentary if I had time to provide it, so think of something cool & pretend I said it.
1. My therapist is moving out of town on the day my sister arrives to visit for the first time since I moved out here four years ago. heh.

2. So yes, I totally do internet dating, & now has context-driven ads next to the profiles. The one that showed up for my search today?
Large Friends - Date Fat Girls in your City
Dedicated club for meeting fat singles for love or relationship. Free membership.

Jeebus, man. I know my stomach still has about 10 pounds to go before it's flat, but really that's a little uncalled for!