Tuesday, June 21, 2005

E.Spat, never say I don't love you, baby.

so, my girl Energy Spatula posted her derision today for MSN's list of what a woman should own & called for each girl to make her own. E.Spat, I cannot deny a fellow sister in "Why do these weird people say these things to me?" anything. And seriously, we need to figure out when we're having that drink once you're off the east coast.
From MSN, Ten Things Every Woman Should Own:
with claris' commentary, of course.

1. A fabulous photo of yourself
good. luck.
2. A pretty pair of heels
you want me to go shoe shopping? Have you met me?
3. An Eminem CD
I'm good, thanks.
4. A great pickup line…and a way to blow 'em off
Dude, I'm so used to being a freak beacon that when guys are actually hitting on me, I totally don't realize it. Seriously, I've had friends laugh at me for this in the past.
5. A six-pack of good bottled beer
Sam Adams? Not a good microbrew. Start with Mad Hatter since you seem to be new, and then we'll work on bigger things.
6. Bathroom reading
Right now mine is Sense & Sensibility - what's yours?
7. A business card
For which job?
8. Earplugs
do the headphones I wear at work count?
9. A straight male friend on your speed-dial
Just 'cause he's on speed-dial doesn't mean he's gonna pick up. love some of my straight guy friends, but yeah.
10. A condom
I'm not even screwing around with anyone right now, and I've got more than just one condom in my house, thanks. One? Kind of unambitious of them.

No, for real?
From Claris, Ten Things Every Woman Should Have:
1. a dog/cat - because when you need a good cry, they'll just curl up & snuggle on the bed with you.

2. Minimum 2 pairs of boots
1 - hiking boots that you've had for years & can wear to do damn near anything
1 - pair of knee boots that you can wear out with a skirt when you're having a day, or under a nice pair of pants to work so you can sit in meetings & think, "What would you say if you knew my boots could kick your ass even without me in them?" - it's like the shoewear equivalent of naked under a trenchcoat, only without the naked in the work environment. I have a pair of tall black leather knee boots that lace all the way up the front. They're bitch boots, & I wore them so much I have to get them re-treaded.
for the record, I at present have three pairs of boots & have been eyeing a fourth.

3. DVDs of movies/TV shows with witty banter, romance not patronizing to the female gender, and situations where things blow up. Because sometimes, you just need to watch something blow up.
"Shooting makes me feel better!" - Aeryn Soon

4. Sarah McLachlan, Norah Jones, David Gray, Jimi Hendrix BBC Blues album, and Jason Mraz.
I mean the CDs, of course, 'cause could you imagine having all those personalities living with you? If nothing else, how would you feed them all?

5. John Mayer.
no, that time I mean the actual guy. ;p

6. the straight guy friend who answers the phone that you can go to dinner with & have it not be weird & with pressure, but just fun enough that you both walk away thinking it's awfully nice to be appreciated.

7. The jeans that you love.
For me - low rise boot cut jeans from the Gap in long in the darkest wash they have available at the moment. Minimum two pair.

8. I know it's not like, particularly sexy or whatever, but, well, Gladware has made my absentminded life exponentially better. It's possible that the day I discovered ZipLoc makes disposable containers that have screw on tops so they'll hold soup well, I literally shared my joy with my friends. It's sad, I know this.

9. High speed internet access at home & the fastest processor available on the (computer) hardware of your choice.

10. Triple-A.
Because sometimes, no matter how independent you are, even if you have indeed had experiences in life that mean you know how to test the circuit breakers for your engine with a plastic covered paperclip...when it's 11:30 at night & raining & you're in the Valley...it's really nice to be able to have the tow truck guy come change your tire in half the time it would have taken you.


At 9:43 AM, Anonymous raithen said...

oh ya - gotta love me some Claris listing! and commentary!!

and AMEN to the boots!!


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