Friday, September 30, 2005

When everyone worried about burning, I found snow.

Last night, I stayed home from doing anything because the vacuum tube on my car had a crack & was being replaced.

I was bored.

Those of you who know me are aware that the previous sentence is an idication that mischief shall ensue.

Here's the thing. As I've mentioned, my apt. bldg. has its quirks...including the appliances. When I first moved into the studios in the back, I had an oven that could cook anything in half the time that the recipie said. It wasn't burnt, it just seemed to work REALLY FAST. Meanwhile, in the 1 bdrm I'm in now, I have a fridge that's kinda...wonky. It is indeed extremely cold. So cold that even though I leave it on 5, inevitably a block of ice builds up over the top right half - and I do mean block. Every six mos. or so, I will clean out my fridge and melt that bad boy down by putting a hair dryer in the fridge & closing the door for about 15 min, then remove the hair dryer for half an hour & letting it cool down before starting again.

Last night, I decided ah what the hell. The last time I did this was the night before I was supposed to fly back east...I cleaned the house from front to back because I was afraid if I went to sleep I'd miss my shuttle to the airport. so what with that having been ten months ago...yeah. I'm lazy, and it was a really big block of ice. But I started up the hair dryer that Anya bequeathed me when she visited & was horrified to discover I didn't own one, and went to go watch last week's ep of Bones. Yes, I kinda like it, shut up.

Anyway, so about an hour later, I hear this THUNK. since the hair dryer wasn't even going at that point, I go over to see what the hell that was - the block of ice had fallen off completely. and holy crap was this thing heavy. I tossed it in the sink (before I did that, I had to quickly do my dishes, but I will cop to the fact that for about thirty seconds, I considered just letting the block of ice melt on the dishes to "help" them "soak". ::cough::)

Then I opened the freezer.

Snow. My freezer was full of ice & snow.

hrm.

Something like that...you gotta share that, right? I mean, snow in the middle of West LA at the end of Sept....really, that's a present that one should never just keep to themselves. Therefore, I got a big ball of snow, packed it really well, and walked to knock on my neighbor J's door. J is a lovely guy from TN, and I'm sorry, but there's just something really fun about gay guys from the south. maybe it's the accent, I dunno. Anyway he opens the door, & I cheerily annouce, "Present!", hand him a snowball, and walk away. Behind me, I hear, "What...how...this is great!"

So on a day when a fire burned 26 sq miles of Southern California, I stood in the courtyard to my apt. bldg. and threw snowballs for my dog.

Unfortunately, when I get home tonight I have to do the part of cleaning the fridge that involves 409 with Bleach. Less fun!
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Note to co-worker...if you have actually spent so much time in meetings that you've gone ahead & made a "facilitator's kit" so that you can just pick it up & go to run a meeting in a pinch...
...maybe it's time to re-evaluate how much time you're spending in meetings.

Just a thought.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

it's only anxiety if...okay yeah no it's pretty much just anxiety.

my apt. bldg. is...interesting. At one point I described the place as being only about one step up from a college dorm, and the neighbor I was talking to at the time came back to me a week alter & said, "You know, I was thinking about the whole college dorm thing, and yeah...we really are."

We've got :
Stoner Quota:
Two apts. are good for supply should I ever decide to take up that past time. Seriously, at Thanksgiving, one of them had a Thanksgiving tray of proper paraphenalia laid out prettily.
Heterosexuals:
1 het guy, 4 het girls
Homosexuals:
3 female (2 a married couple), 1 guy
Animals:
5 dogs, at least 13 cats
The Token Worrier:
that would be our single lesbian
The Crochety One:
that would be the woman that's older than all of us & has been known to call the Humane Society 'cause of the dogs
Instant Party Production Capacity:
while the people who pulled it off no longer live there, I literally once saw a kegger assemble in the space of 45 minutes one afternoon. True story.

Anyway, so that's actually just a smidgen of the plethora of personalities that can inhabit 10 apts. We're Melrose Place, only way less pretty, and less sex, and no pool to throw one another in as culmination of bitchy cat-fights. Actually, we don't have bitchy cat-fights. However, we're incredibly nosy, & it's possible that my neighbor stepped out of her apt. one morning to smoke only to have a couple of us congratuate her on the fact she got laid the night before, because we'd all seen her & her date go in, but no one came out. *g*

Lack of maturity: check!

Anyway, last night one of the married lesbians that lives in the studios up back was talking about Reiki & the practice of it, since she's a first level practitioner & all. Then she tells me that my dog's head is very, very busy. I think, of course it is - I mean, shit, when I leave the house every day my instructions are "Be good & don't blow anything up." That right there should tell you about my canine.

However, S went on to tell me that Zoey is slightly ADD & she's a worrier. Supposedly, my dog's brain is very very anxious. Which yeah great, now I'm looking at her & thinking, "What are you worrying about, huh?"

Because now I'm worried that the dog is worried. And theoretically, if animals pick up on our emotions, my being worried will only make her more worried, which will increase my anxiety, and you see how this is just an endless cycle of badness, right?

This just can't end well, people.
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In other news, I turned down a job today, and I think I have a dinner date next week.

Somehow, in the last four months I've gone from running like hell from the last job which was causing panic attacks involving projectile vomiting to a week where I had five different job possibilities, which I've knocked down to three.

Also I seem to be doing fairly well with the salon.com personals. The boys are actually literate, and not one profile that's e-mailed me has included the words "My agent..." -- which means it's already beating match.com hands down.

However, now I'm plagued by a fear that at the end of this I'm going to somehow end up unemployed...not to mention all those fun paranoias one gets when re-entering dating for the first time in a while, combined with the fact I have a pretty heavy extra cirricular activity list for freelance, school, and crew, I'm spending the day convinced I'm going to bomb out of everything and be a huge failure.

Oh, and I'm trying to buy a new (to me) car.

And I'm worried that the dog is worried.

On a bright note, I think this post has just displayed where the dog gets the worrying from.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

New Money, LA style.

You know, there's this indefinable quality that my mom used to term as cooth. Call it what you want - class, style, j'ne sais quois...it's that little bit that gives someone the last little...enth to carry off whatever they're doing & not be seen as ostentacious when others would look as though they're putting on airs.

For an example of this, please see George Clooney vs. Tom Cruise.

'nuff said.

and you really see the contrast between those two mediums in Los Angeles. One example of that is how people spend their money, and whether they show how they spent their money. Just because I got my shoes at KMart for $15 doesn't mean I'll tell anyone except my friends - it means that when asked, you respond, "You know, I can't for the life of me remember where I got them, I just love them." Let them think that I bought them at Armani Exhange...

A lot of people refer to this lack of attention to detail as "new money". Last night, I saw a prime example of this...

silver Audi TT goes by me on Wilshire. beautiful car, shiny, sparkly, whole nine yards.

Lisence plate holder:

www.123kia.com

I got mine at Glendale KIA


Riiight. that my friends, would be an example of new money. A used TT still isn't cheap, but maybe next time...you should spend the $1.50 at Wal-Mart so we don't all know you bought it used at Kia dealership. Way to go, Swifty.

Friday, September 16, 2005

and we'll finish this Friday with a vaccinated dog, and PAIN.

Zoey went to the vet. She is, it would seem, stupidly ridiculously healthy. Which I totally couldn't tell by the fact that my dog will run four miles with me, and when we get home, do laps around the courtyard. Freak.
But now, she's a vaccinated freak. And I think that's important.
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Did a favor gig valeting for VotD last night...it'd been about two months since I'd valeted. I think 4th of July was the last time. Was kind of amusing to discover that I'm like an elder, for lack of a better word. been working for VotD for over a year? That's the equivalent of forever! heh.

Also, in doing an intranet for VotD (I'm not just a valet, I'm also their new web designer - long story), I have created a really frellin' pink site.

I mean, it's BARBIE pink.

That was traumatic. And yet, I don't hate it. This, for me, is almost progress. See, I'm learning, I'm growing, I'm becoming a better person.

Okay, probably not.
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Have decided to bite the bullet & get a different car. Which sucks because I got the title for my present car like, this week, but honestly, for the money that I'd pay to fix everything on my car, I could just go take a Jetta off a trust fund baby. besides, with gas prices, no more SUV, thankyouverymuch.
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I have a small wound on my palm - I got a blister from rowing and popped it. It's only about the size of like, two pinheads side by side. So yesterday in the shower, I didn't really think about it, & automatically went to use salt scrub on my legs. For those of you not familiar with salt scrub, you apply it just like lotion - by putting it on your hands & rubbing it on your skin.
Salt scrub also contains a good amount of astringent.

On the freshly opened blister on my palm.

Now, I've got a pretty high pain tolerance (after all, when I open a blister, I spray it with camphor facial astringent to clean it) ...but this one? Dude, I think my neighbors across the street heard my cry of "Mother of FUCK!"

I decided not to exfoliate the other leg.

I think this is a wise choice.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Good idea...bad idea...

Anyone else remember those segments in Animaniacs Things like
"Good idea...do it yourself home improvement...
Bad Idea...do it your self dentistry..."

This is pretty much a small sement of the Bad Ideas portion of online dating.

To guys everywhere:
If you're going to put yourself on the Salon.com personals, or really any personals section, I offer these tidbits.

--> Never ever EVER put up a photo of yourself having a moment of projectile vomiting.

No, never.

Really. Never.

::hand up:: no! I don't want to hear how funny it was at the time. Just...never.

--> And to the guy dressed up as a pirate complete with eyepatch & fake stuffed parrot on your shoulder - amusing, but you're possibly going to do worse than the projectile vomit guy.

--> My favorite amusement so far has been the guy who took his obligatory picture of himself by standing in front of a mirror in the men's bathroom and holding up his cell phone. Dude, you couldn't photoshop out the urinals? Personally, I'm just glad there was no one behind you using them.

Friday, September 09, 2005

bugger.

(4:15 am) Get up to go to crew.

(4:45 am) ..realized I need gas. Stopped to get gas...couldn't find my wallet. Oh no. Come on, I put it in my backpack last night while I was on the phone with Sally, where the hell...can't find it. At all.

(4:55am) Drive home...bring my gym bag & my backpack into the house where there's lots of light, take everything out of both bags. My wallet somehow fell into one of my schoolbooks - open so that it laid flat & wasn't easily detectable.

(5:10 am) At this point, there's no way I'm getting to the Marina on time, & when the sport involves a bunch of people leaving to go out on the water in a boat, it's not like you can just...join in with the group as they circle the track, so if you're late, you pretty much shouldn't bother. Frell.

(5:15 am) I figure, okay fine, I'm already dressed, I'll just...go for a run, then shower & go to work.

(5:20 am) Get to corner that starts my normal running route...hit play on my CD player...error msg.

(5:21 am) Open CD player, discover there's no CD in there.

(5:22am) Give up. Walk back to apt., take off gym clothes (dropping them on gym bag 'cause I didn't work out so they're not dirty & that's less laundry to do!) put on oversized flannel shirt that can work as nightshirt for now.

(5:30 am) Go back to sleep for an hour.
Lessons learned :
1. Fill up on gas the night before. Otherwise, I would have just gone to crew, & eventually found my wallet when I went to buy breakfast at work, & none of this would have happened.

2. I really need an iPod.

The. End.

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Got to work this morning, managed to accidentally delete my entire inbox. Permanently. I never thought I'd type the following sentence, but thank god for Lotus Notes. The calendar's to-Do lists have all my files in each task, so at least I didn't lose data, just the e-mail addresses of a couple of you. oops.

So if you e-mail with me at work...could you e-mail me at work? Because I've lost your e-mail due to being an idiot.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Well, the East Coast explains it, then.

I find it amusing that my company is so large that I get Out of the Office Msgs that Such & Such will be on vacation, and I look at the e-mail & go, "And you are...who?"

::shrug:: at least someone's got vacation time!
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Let's see, it's been a bit. Short version?

  • Still alive.
  • Still employed at day gig.
  • Ditched former employer as freelance client. Interesting story there, but eh, they're gone, I'm not worrying about it.
  • After four years, my car is finally paid for!
  • And four days after that happened, I found out I needed new brakes, a new catalytic converter, and I'll probably have to replace my springs & struts. Anyone know how much new springs & struts will cost? I've already done the brakes & I have the catalytic price, so that's my only remaining mystery.

    that's kind of...it, really. My life just isn't that exciting, I suppose.
    ------------

    I'm rowing with the Intermediates at crew now, which consists of people who race and people who are there for amusement, but are better than the novices. I got moved up earlier, so while the other novices joined our group this morning, I'm already in the lineup of boats with the Big Kids, so to speak.

    I gotta admit, I totally feel like I was just the smartest kid on the short bus. they just move way faster in some points. And I know the whole deal where I'll eventually learn, rah rah rah...but right now I suck and the overachiever in me is having issues with that! ;)
    ------------

    I also started school again last week. Only one course for the moment - mostly 'cause I can't seem to get into the school's online registration to sign up for the online course that begins on the 19th. I'm highly vexed by this. Vexed, I tell you! ::shakey fist::

    you know that professor? the one that's really cool, & knows their shit, but you just...you don't eff around with them? They're not going to let you skip the test w/o explanation & make it up, you can't play dumb & be coddled. Yeah. That one. That's Professor M, who I have this semester for Advanced Internet Scripting and Web Applications - or, as I call it, Advanced Geekery.

    Anyway, some chick comes in about half an hour before the end of the first class and is all, "I couldn't find the classroom, you are the teacher, you have to let me in!" I exchanged glances with one of the Russian guys that was in another class of mine with Professor M, and we just shook our heads - Congratulations WhoeverYouAre, you are d-e-d dead.

    Professor M walks her out of the room, then they both come back ten minutes later. Miss Couldn'tFindTheRoom (which hello, it's not a really BIG campus) wasn't in class last night. Part of me feels like I should feel bad about the fact that she probably got a new one ripped into her, but you know what? After three years of trying to work and go to school in California, I have to say it's effin' nice to see someone actually have consequences for something. I think that's part of what bothers me about LA the most - everyone's so goddamned afraid of hurting someone's feelings. Well, you know what? Sometimes, that's just the way life works.

    One night, I had the shocking audacity to request at SG that they fulfill the contract they'd signed & turn in their source material to me. In some companies in CA, it would seem that assuming a company will keep to a signed contract is like, blasphemy or something. Afterwards, I literally had the CEO of SG say to me, "Where are you from, anyway?"
    I answered "Originally New York, then grew up in New Hampshire."
    "Ah. New York. Well, the East Coast explains it, then."

    Heh. Because you see, the fact that I'm from the East Coast explains why I thought it was necessary for them to wrap up a contract they were six weeks over on completing. And that's just one instance. I seriously thought this was just me until I ended up talking to other people from back East. Totally seperate conversations with people who have never met one another & we all would end with the same sentence - "I have no idea how they get anything done out here!"

    I could go on about this for way longer, but I won't because I didn't expect to end up here by just commenting on the fact I got to see a professor snark a student.

    Incidentally, I found out last night that Professor M is from New England. I guess the CEO of SG would say that explains her too. ;)