Thursday, March 30, 2006

Hi, my name is Claris, & I'm a confluence magnet.

First off, I'd like to make my required bitch about the fact that I'm still tired. Because I am. I got home at 10:30 last night, took off rowing clothes, went to bed, got up at 4:30, put on rowing clothes, went to practice, & now here I am at work. Oy. Thankfully other than the gym, there's no where to be tonight, so I might do things like...answer e-mail, and do the dishes & run laundry. Shocking, I know.

Confluence magnet: A few days ago, Melly alerted me to the fact that's word of the day was "confluence". This is because I often start stories about my life with the words "in a weird confluence of events..." and then I explain how fucked up shit happens to me. ;)

But seriously, it does. Take just...getting to practice in the morning. I was ready. I was set. I packed my gym bag the night before, I had everything laid out, my shoes by the door. I literally set it up so all I had to do was roll out of bed, dress, let the dog out while I put shoes on, then pick up my bags for the day & roll on out to my car. Because yes, my life is such that I find the only way to survive at the moment is to plan my path from the bed to the door & place the appropriate props at the proper points of that journey since at 4:30 am I just won't be able to figure it out.

So I'm good, I'm rolling, everything is fine. It's that moment when I get out of my home & have to deal with the real world where everything just goes to shit. Seriously. Other people, they get up, they get in the car, they drive to the marina, it's all very boring. Me? No. I get harassed by the homeless, there are car accidents blocking the road, I have gas attendants trying to pretend I didn't pay...and today for some reason, some asshole thought it would be great to put a plumbing truck across Crescent Heights at the corner of Wilshire. What the motherfuck, that's what I wanna know. Plus, the taxi in front of me was just...sitting there, waiting for the light to turn. You know, the lights that are tripped by the sensors in the road that we can't reach because there's a truck over half the fucking street?

Then, as I'm going down to the 10/405 know what, here's my thing. If you're out in LA at 5am, it's probably not a random thing. The majority of the time, this is most likely a normal part of your day that you do more than once a week. Therefore, if you drive this stretch of road every day and they've been doing construction on the 405 ramp for the last three months but you know that they only work until 5 am so the ramp is open even if they haven't turn the blinking lights off yet...don't fucking slow down! Just go, people, just go. It's all right, you won't get in trouble, trust me. Trust me. It's okay.

And it's because of crap like this that I end up late for practice even when I leave at a decent time. ::sigh:: Later on, I might talk about the rowing, but honestly? Just the drive to get to the rowing was exhausting for me, so I need to go have a bagel now.


At 5:06 AM, Blogger Megdalen said...

Confluence is one of those words that sounds different than what it means. It sounds like it means "I just puked up a whole bunch of flu."


At 11:21 AM, Blogger claris said...

Thankfully for me, that's not it's meaning. *smooch*

But I do love Meg logic.

At 3:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Seriously dude, you *own* confluence. *g*


At 6:31 PM, Blogger Galactichero said...

I use the word in front of judges and juries, and they all look at me like I'm crazy, which I might be. "In a strange confluence of events, my client happened to have alcohol on his breath while staggering and searching for his lost keys while being the only one near the only car in a parking lot which also happened to have a warm engine, however, the Commonwealth cannot prove beyond a reasonable doubt that he was, in fact, driving." I don't mean to use it, it just comes out, like diarrhea. It's one of those words that sounds smarter than it is.


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